AMY’S BACK!

‘SNL’ Skewers Bondi’s Wild Senate Hearing in Cold Open

Amy Poehler portrayed an angry, blustering Pam Bondi.

Saturday Night Live host Amy Poehler showed up before the monologue to give her spin on Attorney General Pam Bondi. The former SNL cast member depicted Bondi at her Judiciary Committee hearing on Wednesday.

“My name is Pam Bondi,“ Poehler’s Bondi said. ”I spell it with an ‘I,’ because I ain’t gonna answer any of your questions.“

Bondi defiantly continued, “My time is valuable. The DOJ has many ongoing operations, and we’re moving like Kash Patel’s eyeballs: very quickly, in multiple directions at once.”

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Bondi replied to a question from Senator Blumenthal (Mikey Day) by saying, “Before I don’t answer, I’d like to insult you personally.”

She continued, “Senator Blumenthal? Look at this honky. Even people in Connecticut go, ‘Damn, that guy’s white as hell!’”

Referencing the real Bondi’s apparent “burn book” at the hearing, Poehler’s Bondi said, “That’s just one of the many roast-style burns that I have here on this paper. Don’t make me use them.”

Bondi answered a question from Senator Whitehouse, played by new cast member Jeremy Culhane. Whitehouse asked her, “Did the FBI find photos of President Trump with half-naked young women when they raided [Jeffrey] Epstein’s property?”

Bondi replied, “Sir, I’m not even going to dignify that question with a lie.”

When Bondi was pressed further on Trump’s alleged involvement with Epstein, she explained, “I tried reading the Epstein files, but I got really bored. It’s so repetitive: Trump this, Trump that. Yawn!”

Poehler further referenced Bondi’s apparent burn book by telling Amy Klobuchar, played by cast member Ashley Padilla, “You’re a-- out here sounding like a Pokémon. I choose you, Klobuchar!”

To Senator Dick Durbin, played by new cast member Tommy Brennan, Bondi deflected from a question about the ICE raids in Chicago by telling him, “I wish you loved Chicago as much as you hate President Trump.”

The line was a reference to a real line Bondi said at the hearing. When an unimpressed Durbin asked her, “How long you been working on that line?” she replied triumphantly, “Three full months.”

The cold open ended with a surprise appearance from SNL alum Tina Fey as Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem.

“That’s right, it’s me, Kristi Noem,” Fey said, holding an assault rifle.

Mirroring Bondi’s introduction at the start of the sketch, Fey said in her Noem impression, “I spell my name with an ‘I,’ because that’s how I thought it was spelled.”

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Michael Boyle

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