‘NOT A GOOD START’

Samantha Bee Mocks GOP’s ‘Terrible Job’ Defending Trump at Impeachment Hearings

“C’mon, fellas, you’ve been practicing in the mirror all morning long, don’t blow your load in the first two minutes!”

By Matt Wilstein & Martha MercerNov 13, 2019

When her show aired at 10:30 p.m. ET on Wednesday night, Samantha Bee became the first late-night host to tackle day one of the Trump impeachment hearings. And she was pumped.

“One person who isn’t excited is Donald Trump,” the Full Frontal host said, noting that the president “totally did not watch the hearings at all” because he was “too busy”—despite criticizing the performance of the lawyers who did most of the questioning.

Bee then moved onto “Republican ranking member and captain of the congressional flop sweat team, Devin Nunes,” who tried to “discredit” the proceedings by describing them as an elaborate “drama” staged by Democrats.

“Ah, yes, if there’s one thing the Democrats are known for, it’s dazzling spectacles!” Bee joked. “Look at these two thirsty divas they cast,” she said of George Kent and Bill Taylor. “Clearly, they’ll do anything for the spotlight.”

The irony, Bee explained, is that it was actually Nunes and his fellow Republicans who “launched a very staged campaign to interrupt the proceedings and expose the whistleblower.” After playing a clip of their flailing attempts to do just that, she added, “C’mon, fellas, you’ve been practicing in the mirror all morning long, don’t blow your load in the first two minutes!”

“Today was not a good start for Republicans,” Bee said later in the segment. “They didn’t manage to throw the kind of distracting, conspiracy-filled spectacle they’re so good at. Oh, Trump is going to be so mad at what a terrible job they did defending him. I mean, not that he watched it or anything.”

For more, listen to Samantha Bee on The Last Laugh podcast below: