Jon Stewart Is Panicking Over the Presidential Election
The comedian appeared on “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” Friday night and said he’s “terrified” about what might happen on November 3rd.
CBS
With a recently-announced Apple TV+ series and his continued work fighting for the health benefits of veterans, Jon Stewart has been making the publicity rounds of late. And on Friday night, he stopped by his former Daily Show pal Stephen Colbert’s Late Show to celebrate a very special day.
“I wanted to call and say to you, ‘Happy anniversary, friend,’” Stewart told Colbert.
You see, today marks the 10-year anniversary of Stewart and Colbert’s Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear—an event (mocking Glenn Beck’s Restoring Honor rally) at the National Mall in Washington, D.C. that drew 215,000 attendees.
“Wow, what a day it was. We really showed…Glenn Beck,” added Stewart.
Before long, the two old buddies got to the matter at hand: the presidential election on November 3rd. And Stewart seemed, well, a bit worried about the outcome.
“I’m not good, Stephen. I’m not good. I’m terrified! I’m terrified, I’m anxious, I’m lonely, I’m wishing it was 2010 again. I just…I can’t…An election and a pandemic? How much canned soup and ammunition can one man have, Stephen?” he joked.
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“I just want to know what is gonna happen!” he continued. “I wanna know how much longer we have to keep going through this…On Election Day, are we at the Heartbreak Hill, where all that effort and all that resilience is about to pay off and we’re going to cross the finish line and finally be able to exhale, or is this the halfway point—the 13-mile mark? And when will my nipples stop bleeding? These are questions I have to know, Steve.”
When Colbert asked Stewart what he meant by the so-called “finish line,” he explained, “The finish line, for me, is this man [Trump] not being president anymore and 1,000 people not dying every day from a disease we don’t understand, still…The finish line is the finish line.”
The unfortunate reality, of course, is it may be weeks until we know who the victor is in the 2020 presidential election—owing to the tallying of mail-in ballots and a possible legal challenge from President Trump.
“We don’t even know if we’ll know on Tuesday!” exclaimed Stewart. “And for God’s sake, if an asteroid doesn’t hit us on Monday, because it’s been that kind of shit year!”
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