SCHOOLYARD BULLIES

Colbert Teases Trump for Getting Jealous While All the Other Dictators Had Fun

Donald Trump previously sounded off in a seething rant on Truth Social about the leaders “conspiring” against the U.S.

Stephen Colbert has skewered Donald Trump over this week’s big summit in Beijing, saying the president is down in the dumps because “all the other dictators are off having fun without him.”

The Late Show host’s flaming of the world’s most powerful man came as a host of world leaders—many with autocratic and anti-Western sensibilities—gathered in the Chinese capital to discuss an alternative world system to that led by the U.S., with China’s Xi Jinping, Russia’s Vladimir Putin, North Korea’s Kim Jong Un, and India’s Narendra Modi all making appearances.

“And look who [Xi] invited—Trump’s former best buds, Putin and Kim Jong Un,” Colbert said, referring to a sprawling military parade marking the 80th anniversary of victory over Japan in World War II as part of the summit.

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Trump trashed his own chance at appearing unfazed by the meetup with a scathing Truth Social rant on Wednesday, writing: “May President Xi and the wonderful people of China have a great and lasting day of celebration. Please give my warmest regards to Vladimir Putin, and Kim Jong Un, as you conspire against The United States of America.”

Colbert added sarcastically, “Trump was not jealous at all.”

In a retaliatory clapback, White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt told the Daily Beast: “Isn’t this the guy whose show was recently canceled because he has no talent and no ratings?”

Trump has on multiple occasions expressed his appreciation for the methods of autocratic world leaders, even saying in a recent rebuttal to Illinois’ Democratic Gov. JB Pritzker, in their spat about deploying the National Guard in Chicago: ​​“[I have] the right to do anything I want to do,” Trump said. “I’m the president of the United States. If I think our country is in danger—and it is in danger in these cities—I can do it.”

Colbert, who has torn into Trump since it was announced his CBS show would be ending in spring 2026, continued: “And he really missed out because the bad guy buddies were heard talking on a hot mic about stuff Trump would love to get in on,” before cutting to a quotes from autocratic trio Kim, Xi and Putin discussing organ transplants that could allow people to live to 150.

Trump, in contrast, has been the subject of health concerns after disappearing from public view for four days and exhibiting sore-looking ankles and a bruised back of the hand.

Beyond its exclusive guest list, Xi’s military parade is also likely to have stung Trump in another way. In a rare move, Trump threw a military parade of his own in Washington on June 14 to mark his birthday, but it was widely slammed as a flop, with people sitting near the president flagrantly yawning at shoddy organization and underwhelming visuals.

China’s, meanwhile, was breathtaking with immaculately-drilled troops marching in lockstep along with a brand new generation of tactical equipment, including an intercontinental ballistic missile launcher, and, for good measure, the release of hundreds of balloons and doves.

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Harry ThompsonNews Reporter

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