Blogs and Stories
Bristol Palin's Muddled Message
Charles Rex Arbogast / AP Photo
A New York psychologist on why America’s most famous teen mom shouldn’t be the only one talking to your kids about sex.
Parents, have you had the conversation yet? If not, your teenage daughters are taking their cues from Bristol Palin and Jamie Lynn Spears. Your teenage daughters are seeing other teenage girls become mothers. America’s famous teen moms are out there loud and clear. What’s their message? “[My baby] brings so much joy… I don’t regret it at all,” Bristol, 18 years old, told Fox News’ Greta Van Susteren on Monday night.
Click here to watch Bristol’s full interview.
The message comes through all forms of media—from glossy photo spreads to prime-time interviews, with bright lights, perfect makeup, and doting grandparents cooing over quiet, sleeping babies.
“Everyone should be abstinent but it’s not realistic at all… [sex] is more and more accepted among kids my age,” Sarah Palin’s daughter said.
And then, the message ends. Any talk of alternatives, such as appropriate birth control? No. Any talk of the realities of what life is like caring for a newborn while school, socializing, sleep, and college dreams are put on hold, or maybe gone for good? Not really.
“Of course, I wished it would have happened in, like, 10 years so I could have a job and an education and be, like, prepared and have my own house and stuff,” she said. Well, quite frankly, it could have happened 10 years from now, if only the conversation about personal responsibility and consequences was carried through for young mothers such as Bristol.
But, let’s give Bristol her due credit here. She can’t advocate for contraception while her mother is an icon of the Religious Right. And her message was honest: She now questions the (failed) abstinence approach. She says she wished that she had waited but she can’t go further than that—at least not on national television.
Bristol’s message boils down to: Try to abstain—even though it’s “not realistic”—and if that doesn’t work, try not to have regrets. If that’s where you want to leave your daughters, you can stop reading here.
Still with me? What’s the message from Jamie Lynn Spears, Britney’s 17-year-old sister? “I was in complete and total shock—and so was he!” It almost sounds like Jamie Lynn and her boyfriend did not know where babies came from!
Edwards Sex Tape Details
Investigative journalist and syndicated columnist Diane Dimond has covered the Michael Jackson story since 1993 when she first broke the news that the King of Pop was under investigation for child molestation. She is author of the book, Be Careful Who You Love—Inside the Michael Jackson Case. She lives in New York with her husband, broadcast journalist Michael Schoen.
The 800 Dangerous Airbus Planes in the Sky
Clive Irving is senior consulting editor at Conde Nast Traveler, specializing in aviation—find his blog, Clive Alive, at CliveAlive.Truth.Travel.
exploora
I am sure the kids know the theory, I think when she said "sex just happens" implied she wasn't planning it so she wasn't doing the "planned parenthood thing" either, before her mother walked in she may have had planned to add more points, before her mother walked in.
This is a person who is dependent on her mother possibly more than on the baby's father, for support, of course she has to be careful what she says. Or that is what it appeared like.
Her baby is beautiful. The whole family is very beautiful really, and Bristol probably hasn't realized the power of such a pull. They don't even have to be that smart to get ahead. Bristol's baby is a lucky guy. He has looks, a family, wealth. And it wasn't even planned, and look what he was born into.
Unfortunately this is not the way it is for most unwanted kids, there is probably nothing worse than to be an unwanted kid.
xbainx
Planned Parenthood gives out discount contraceptives. They offer ways to have safe disease-free sex. They do 24 hour rape counseling. They don't judge people based on religion like some pharmacists.
Rape in the all branches of the military is holding steady at about 14% since women have been allowed to serve. And yet a woman can't receive an abortion on any American military base in the world. She also can't fight while pregnant. I see we have a dilemma here. Either acknowledge abortions are sometimes necessary or act like children and ignore the grim realities of life.
sallyma
well thank goodness, a reasoned comment on Bristol's interview. The online media have ravaged the poor girl. Slate XX factor women attacked the girl:
http://www.femisex.com/content/exactly-this-what-woman-have-fear-other-w omen-slate-xx-female-hate
, and Salon was no better.
I am so tired of women as Mean Girls, so 80s and i'm so over it!
Thanks DB for staying above all that on this. Yes, teen pregnancy is a sad tale, but I am reminded of something i read in the New Yorker recently. A writer (Roger Tk) wrote that upon the death of his grown daughter who left behind 2 kids the maid said that such things happen but, thankfully, this family was better able to deal than most. That clearly applies to the Palin Family who now have two large challenges ahead of them,but are better prepared than most to cope.
exploora
I have no idea who started that donate to planned parenthood and and ask them to send thank you message to Palin, but I think it was a great idea. I think Bristol was trying to say plan parenthood, and was too scared to say it. That is just my impression.
rbegrnmt
Gov. Palin is religious and conservative...so what. I don't think that automatically means that Bristol was uninformed or did or didn't use contraceptionShe was talking about abstinence not being realistic...that's all. Ms Albano should back up her opinion with facts that Gov. Palin is "anti-contraception" before assuming what her beliefs are. I don't know Sarah Palin's opinion on contraception but I do know being pro-life doesn't automatically mean you shield your children from discussions about sex or using birth control.
finderj
I live in a city with one of the highest teen pregnancy/teen STD rates in the nation, and this city has kept its place on that list for more than twenty-five years. Guess what methods of sex education are taught here? Right. Abstinence only. Yep. This city's statistics are proof positive that abstinence only is the only way to teach teens about sex. Our teen mothers are not nearly as famous as Bristol Palin or Jamie Lynn Spears, but they are absolutely as well-informed. Too bad that they aren't as wealthy, famous and well-placed with extended family and the ability to hire all the help and care they and their babies will need.
This is an issue that is vital to our nation. Teen mothers are many times more likely to have premature babies, with all the attendant health complications. Children born to unwed teen mothers are far more likely to require special education programs, to use drugs and alcohol, and to wind up incarcerated than children born into stable marriages with physically mature mothers. Guess who foots the bill for these problems? Right! You do. I do. All us taxpayers are paying through the nose for the abstinence-only programs for teens, and look at how well they are working!
This user is no longer registered.
sippewissett
What I 'love' most about the Palin hypocrisy is that while she doesn't believe in contraception or abortion, she also doesn't believe that the government should help unwed mothers. Who will? Does Palin have a clue about life beyond moose chili and dogsled racing? Not that I can tell.
This user is no longer registered.
NinaMiller
Thank you for a reasoned column on this subject, finally. I'm a feminist and a progressive, and as such I believe that policies should be driven by evidence, not ideology.
Which is why I am so sick and tired of people chuckling over Sarah Palin's alleged "hypocrisy" on this subject. The only hypocrisy is coming from so-called progressives who refuse to look at the facts, lest they get in the way of that warm, cozy feeling one gets when one indulges in delusions of superiority.
Palin said quite clearly in her interview September 2008 interview with CBS: "Well, I am all for contraception."
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/09/30/eveningnews/main4490788.shtml? sour%20ce=mostpop_story
In August 2006, while running for Governor, Palin said:
"I'm pro-contraception, and I think kids who may not hear about it at home should hear about it in other avenues. So I am not anti-contraception. But, yeah, abstinence is another alternative that should be discussed with kids. I don't have a problem with that. That doesn't scare me, so it's something I would support also."
http://articles.latimes.com/2008/sep/06/nation/na-sexed6
Furthermore, under Palin's administration, Alaska turned down federal funds earmarked for abstinence-only education programs. Alaska is not one of the "abstinence-only" states.
http://thenewagenda.net/2008/09/10/sarah-palin-sex-education/#more-234
And by the way - it is expected that Palin will *increase* funding for maternal and child health in Alaska.
If you can't tell already, this has become a pet peeve of mine. It seems that very few people will let the facts dampen that good old fashioned witch burning spirit.
rbegrnmt
Thank you pricklypear
woodnut
Oh boy, like mother like daughter, huh?
lolovesmaddow
You can't expect these mothers to say, "I regret having my child." Pychologically Damaging Quotes From My Mother for 1000, Alex!
But there is fault in their answers. Bristol Palin bumbles rubbish about wanting "a house and stuff," and it's clear that no one talked to this child about being an effective parent [or speaking proper English like an on-level high school Senior, for that matter.]
She shouldn't be advocating anything. She wasn't abstinent and she won't be abstinent [nor will the rest of the teenage population], so she shouldn't be advocating that. It doesn't work; it never will again.
What would be a productive use of her time would be advocating safer sex and school funding for sex education. As a 17 year old high school Junior, the extent of my sex ed was one slide on a power-point about abstinence. Thanks for the "education"!
finderj
Aww, where would be the fun in letting facts determine who gets tarred and feathered tonight?
AndreainNY
Thank you, NinaMiller. I've been bothered, too, by the lack of respect shown this young lady. I know of no other young, unwed pregnant teen who has been ridiculed by the so-called progressives as she has been.
It almost appears as though progressives only support young, unwed pregnant teens when they fall into their definition of a "victim" category and/or choose to abort.
Thank you.
As a first time user, your comment has been submitted for review. It can take anywhere from a few hours to a day or two for your comment to be reviewed, depending on the time of week and the volume of comments we receive.